April 2025 - Reclaiming Love: The Somatic Path to Self-Acceptance
How often do you look outside of yourself, toward relationships, accomplishments, or validation from others, for the love and belonging you crave?
I used to believe that love was something I had to earn; something given to me by partners, friends, family, and society. I sought love through external validation: affection, approval, recognition. I longed to be seen, heard, and understood for who I truly was, yet I constantly morphed myself to fit other people’s perceptions of who they thought I needed to be.
I wasn’t cultivating self-connection or attunement, and as a result, I found myself in unfulfilling relationships, people-pleasing, and feeling unseen, unheard, and disrespected. This pattern led me to partners and friendships that didn’t truly align with who I wanted to be but instead reinforced the subconscious conditioning I had been raised with.
It took experiencing a deeply troubled relationship, one that became abusive over nearly three years, before I began the journey of self-acceptance and self-love. Hitting rock bottom pushed me to change my patterns and rewire my neural pathways. Over the last six years, I have transformed my life by learning to embody the love I once sought externally.
This shift was not just a mental decision, it was a physiological and embodied transformation.
As Dr. Nicole LePera teaches in How to Be the Love You Seek, love is not just a mindset shift; it is an embodied experience. When we lose touch with our internal signals (something many of us, especially women, are conditioned to do in order to fit in) we become disconnected from our natural intuition.
Rebuilding this connection requires somatic awareness, because love is not just a thought, it is a felt experience of safety, presence, and openness in the body. Love exists in how we breathe, how we move, and how we hold ourselves in moments of stillness.
Somatic movement offers a direct pathway to reconnecting with the body’s wisdom. Through intuitive movement, we can express and release emotions, creating space for love to flow naturally rather than remaining blocked by tension or stored trauma.
Moving with intention strengthens self-trust. Following the body’s natural impulses fosters attunement. Learning to recognize and honour sensations without judgment deepens self-acceptance.
A Simple Somatic Practice to Try
If you’re curious about how this feels in practice, try this simple exercise:
Put on a song with a rhythm that resonates with you. Something grounding, like Landslide by Fleetwood Mac, or something expansive, like Consider Me by Allen Stone.
Close your eyes and place your hands over your heart.
Let your body start to move naturally. Maybe a slow sway, maybe subtle shifts in weight, allowing your breath to guide you.
As you move, internally affirm: I am worthy of love, just as I am.
Notice any sensations or emotions that arise. Observe them without judgment, and allow yourself to move through the entire song.
If this resonates with you, consider what might unfold when you dedicate intentional time to embodied movement.
This work is not always graceful. Sometimes, reconnecting with the body feels clumsy or vulnerable. There were times I would put on music and find myself frozen, unsure of how to move, afraid that if I really let go, I would uncover something too big for me to hold. But over time, I learned that even the stillness holds wisdom. The body speaks in whispers before it ever screams. When we begin to listen, it starts to trust us again. That trust becomes the foundation for the kind of self-love that doesn’t depend on other people’s approval.
What I’ve come to understand is that love, when truly embodied, isn’t something we perform. It’s how we exist with ourselves in the quiet moments; how we speak to ourselves when no one else is watching, how we return to presence after being pulled away by fear, shame, or doubt.
It’s not always loud or visible. Sometimes, it’s simply choosing to breathe through discomfort instead of abandoning yourself. That small act of staying with yourself is powerful.
You don’t need to be perfect to be lovable. You don’t need to be fully healed, always enlightened, or endlessly positive. You just need to be willing. Willing to show up for yourself, to feel, to move. The journey back to self-love isn’t linear, but it is sacred. Every time you return to your body with tenderness instead of judgment, you unlearn the belief that love must be earned. You remember what has always been true: that love begins with you.
The more we return to our bodies, the more we remember that we belong; to ourselves, to the earth, to the present moment. Movement becomes ritual. Breath becomes anchor. And within that space, we create the safety we’ve been longing for. Not because the world outside has changed, but because we’ve changed how we relate to ourselves within it.
With love,
Zofia
